October 5, 2010

Needed Sunshine







The weekend was heavy with emotions and memories.  It was two years ago that Leah was released from the care of her oncologist at Duke. For the first time in over a year filled with worry, pregnancy, surgeries and a long recovery, we felt safe and free from this unexpected, scary burden.  The very next day came the horrific news of the loss of our niece and we were plunged into a grief and sadness darker than any other we had faced.   On Saturday, we sought out the best (and cheapest) therapy around, we headed outside and allowed the sunshine, crisp fall breeze, monkey bars and peek-a-boo to soothe our wounded hearts. 

Ben and Clara have the protection of childhood to shield them from deep fear and despair, but in their own way they understand that things here on earth aren’t as they should be.  When these moments of introspection are revealed through Clara tenderly touching Leah’s scar on her neck and asking again and again, “Mommy’s boo-boo all better?” or Ben wondering about heaven, so assured he will one day play with his cousin Grace, that they bring another kind of sunshine to our hearts, one that allows us to believe in healing, love and hope for our world.  

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