This is a difficult post to write, to put these words down and hit publish, to make them indeed our reality. Our intention with this small corner of cyberspace has always been to just share a glimpse of our life, to allow those dear to us and far away to see the kids and to help us recognize the joy and beauty of each day, each season, each stage of life as “Casa Watson.” That’s about it. But we were recently blindsided in a way that has turned our little life upside down, wounded our hearts deeply and now we must share here what has happened.
At the end of the month Mark will be leaving First Presbyterian Church in Newton, NC. We will simply say this— Mark did nothing wrong and it was not our desire to leave. Mark has served faithfully, with integrity, with love, accomplishing much in his five and a half years here to move the church forward. The process was not pursued “decently and in order” (a Presbyterian mantra). The majority of the congregation was unaware this was happening to us and when they found out were extremely upset. We feel battered, betrayed and heartbroken-not only for us, but for the church we've loved that is now suffering a time of pain and turmoil.
So, what is next? Mark will finish his time with FPC Newton at the end of the month. Our beloved, memory-filled home is now on the market (start praying for a sale, people). We will enjoy a long-planned, Scottish-drenched, Watson family reunion here at the start of July as we all attend the Highland Games in the mountains. Then in mid-July we will box up all our furniture, pillows and pictures, move it cross-country, put most of it in storage and see what comes next. We are grateful for a fair severance package that will help us take care of our family during this transition and we are overwhelmed by the love, support and concern shown to us by so many in the congregation and the community.
After hours of discussion, prayer and counsel we have made the decision to begin our job search and the considerable task of healing from the place that most feels like home. David and Judy have generously (and fearlessly!) offered to have us come live with them through the end of the year in Santa Barbara. Mark has many contacts up and down the coast; Leah will seek out part-time personal assistant/event planning work and the kids will feel safe and secure in a place they know well, surrounded by many who love them and the not-to-be-ignored small details of the beach, beauty, great friends and real Mexican food.
We do not want to downplay how difficult this transition is for us. Sadly, in talking with others in ministry our story is not uncommon. With the faltering economy and growing anxieties and fears, many pastors are becoming targets for the stress that surrounds everyone and are facing forced exits in alarming numbers. After all the challenges we have been through these past few years, our desire was to live a simple life focused on our faith and family. To have our security highjacked when we have two small children to take care of is an overwhelming and fear-filled challenge.
At the start of the year we chose joy as our theme for 2011 and we hold true to that commitment. For in the midst of darkness and pain we are given joy-filled reminders each day— healthy kids who fill our days with curiosity, cuddles and comfort, closing in on a three-year anniversary of Leah being cancer free, a marriage that has been tested from so many angles, yet stands strong on a foundation and trust not of our making, friends and family who love us unconditionally, an outpouring of support from near and far and in most moments, a peace that does surpass all understanding as we hold onto the promises of God.
A wise friend told us, “Don’t try to climb the whole mountain, just hike to one tree at a time.” Tree by tree, prayer by prayer, mercy by mercy, we begin the journey.
Jeremiah 29:11-13
For surely I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord, plans for your welfare and not for harm, to give you a future with hope. Then when you call upon me and come and pray to me, I will hear you. When you search for me, you will find me; if you seek me with all your heart.
5 comments:
Leah, thank you for sharing this. I am so sorry to hear it and I will be praying for Casa Watson, wherever it may be physically located.
We are studying the story of Joseph at church right now - talk about a rough start to life! But, at the end, when Joseph is reunited with his family, he says 50:19 - "Do not fear, for am I in the place of God? As for you, you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good..."
I hope these words are a comfort to you as they are to me!
I don't have the words to express my sorrow. It was a shock to hear you were leaving, but I am confident that your strong faith will see you through this tough time. I hold you in my thoughts and pray for a speedy transition to a new church family. In the meantime, hold on to the joy. Much love goes out to you and your family during this difficult time.
My heart still is breaking for you. It is a challenge to all. Leah have become one of my closest friends and a woman who speaks her mind (which I love, we both get looks for that). I cried all afternoon yesterday (and lost my card as I walked sobbing to the car). Your family helped us feel connected and I am sad to miss those events with you. Your children are dear to me. How will I ever find a nicer boy for Abigail to spend time with than Ben. Finally, Mark, you are an amazing man and pastor. You seemed to know us and our needs before we even shared with you. Your welcoming heart has always been and always will make you a dear friend. You may move but I will always consider your family our friends.
Awesome post Leah. "Bird by bird," our favorite writer, Ann Lamott, likes to say. And you're living it.
A shout out from far away, a long time away, saying "we love you."
Praying for you & your family, Mark. Be strong and courageous in the Lord. He is with you and ahead of you every step of the way.
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